Double lock buckles coming soon for my Child-to-Adult Harnesses

I" double lock rock lockster buckle

It's silly the things I get excited about but this little baby right here has become my new gold.

Think I've lost my marbles? Maybe, but since this buckle was incredibly difficult to find and took lots of phone calls and emails to track down, when I finally located a company that could order them for me, I felt like I'd hit paydirt.

Oh sure, a number of companies have 1 inch locking buckles on their websites but contact them to order some and you quickly find out that they don't carry that buckle, they don't make that buckle, they don't have that buckle and furthermore, they can't get that buckle. "Then why the heck is it on your website!!!???" "Oh well, it is available as a special order and you'd have to pay for a gazillion of them before we would ask the factory to make them for you but sorry, we can't send you a sample first to make sure you like them."

But I digress. The point is, I've succeeded and fingers crossed within the month I'll have these buckles listed as an ordering option on my website.

The buckle is called a double lock rock lockster and it takes 2 hands to open. You squeeze the sides with one hand and press the tab with the other to pop the buckle open. For those parents who know they need locks on the Child-to-Adult Harness they order for their child, this locking buckle will be perfect. Since the buckles on the harness are at the child's back, odds are good that the child won't be able to figure out (sight unseen) the two-handed process needed to open the buckle. Anyway, that's the plan. 

Right now I offer my customers locking carabiners as an option for their Child-to-Adult Harness. The locking carabiners have been wonderful and have done the job beautifully over the past 3 years but a few months ago when my supply was running low and I placed another order, I ran into difficulties. Essentially, I wouldn't be able to get any more of the small locking carabiners I use now.

But as with all things related to this business run by God, along comes a lovely lady by the name of Leanna who tells me about cop-lock buckles that need 2 hands to open. And the hunt was on. 99% of the industry uses 2 inch cop-lock buckles, hence the difficulty in locating 1 inch buckles that I need for my harnesses. But that's all water under the bridge now and I've nailed a supplier and placed my order. I've opted for the more expensive buckles made in the USA rather than the cheaper ones made overseas because I really like the quality of the American buckle and I want to support a company south of the border. I'm so thrilled that later this week I'm going to make a YouTube video to show off my sample buckle to the masses.

Have I lost my marbles? Maybe. But when I find something that I think will be GREAT for my customers, that's great quality, that's made by a company on this side of the pond, that's a reason to celebrate. Heck, it's even a reason to make a video.

Migraine management

If you didn't choose your parents carefully, you likely inherited their tendency for migraines. Even a history on one side of your family will tip the odds against you.

If you suffer from migraines, this won't be news to you. When you've been stricken with illness you've likely taken an inventory of your parents, aunts, uncles, even grandparents and in your mind pointed a shaking finger in their direction and thought "This is your doing".

Whereas a family history of migraines will increase your likelihood of experiencing them, it's the triggers that we sufferers need to identify. Prevention is key.

• pay attention to what your body is telling you. Your body likely gives you a number of signals before a migraine begins. You may have that particular 'sick' feeling, you may see flashing lights (even hours or the day before). Be attentive. It's likely too late to prevent the migraine but at least you'll have time to get yourself set up to deal with it. 
• if a migraine takes you by surprise, look at the previous few days. Did you over-exert yourself? Are you particularly tired? Did you eat something unusual? Did you not eat when you needed to? Be critical and try to think of anything and everything that was out of your normal pattern. Your latest episode was caused by something and it's important to figure out what. 
• triggers can change over time. For me, this was indeed an upsetting and unexpected revelation. One thing the doctors fail to mention to new Moms is that along with a new baby, the mother may also get a new body. Sure you look the same on the outside, but all your inner workings that were turned upside down to make the baby may not reset to The Normal You. All sorts of inconveniences like depression, psychosis, suicide and infanticide may bubble up thanks to hormone levels that neglected to reset to Default post delivery. Sleep disruption and foods that never caused migraines in the past may now be triggers so no, you're not losing your mind, you just need to learn your triggers all over again.
• along the same theme, fluctuating hormone levels can also be the culprit. Changing hormone levels may never have caused you grief in the past but now you may find yourself with a migraine in the middle of your month AND when your cycle starts. There are specific medications for migraine sufferers to combat one type of hormone spike but not both so if you get migraines twice a month, you're on your own. But once through menopause, you should be in the clear. 
• watch for chemicals, bacteria and hormones in your food. Yogurt that you've been eating for years may now have you bedridden if you chance a spoonful. Preservatives in store-bought cookies that give them a shelf life of 10 years may now have you reaching for your pills. Remember that migraines are caused by something so if you don't know what that something is, put your food diary and your migraine diary together and think that Anything could be the culprit. It took me months to figure out the yogurt I was eating was causing the problem because the company had changed their recipe when they changed their packaging. But since I'd been eating that yogurt for years, it never occurred to me that it would be a problem now. 
• migraines DO occur in children! Keep a close eye on your kids if they tell you they have a headache and don't feel well. If you have first-hand experience with migraines, one look and you'll know if they are experiencing the same. Tell your child's doctor about the episode next time you're in. Don't let the doctor blow you off and tell you you're wrong "because migraines are extremely rare in children". Make sure the incident is recorded in your child's medical chart, it's important to have a history.

Every day without a headache is a blessing, a reason to celebrate that right here right now I don't have pain in my head or nausea in my stomach. In the meantime, keep your supply of Advil gel caps extra strength liquid migraine pills, 400mg, handy. It takes 20 minutes for the medication to get into your system and take the edge off that crack in your head. Tomorrow will hopefully be better.

Charitable donations. Who gets my money

First of all, regardless of who makes the charitable donation, apply the tax receipts against the person in your household with the largest income. For example, if the receipts are in your name but your spouse has the larger income, your spouse would claim the charitable donation deduction to reduce their taxable income.

Here ends my income tax advice.

I have 3 charities that I support. The first is the school that my boys attend. Last year when my oldest was in Grade 1 he would come home and talk endlessly about the PASS Room where he would go each recess to sign out a shovel or some other play equipment. He LOVED the PASS Room. I made some enquiries and learned that the PASS Room was actually a safe haven where children with behavioural issues could go during the day to calm down if they were having difficulty coping in the classroom. These children do not have a diagnosis, they are just kids who are not valued by their parents and their behaviour and social development reflects this. The PASS Room was created by the school to address behaviour problems and is supervised by 2 Special Ed qualified teachers. It has desks and cubicles so students who have been removed from their classroom can sit quietly without distraction and complete their work. They also stock healthy snacks for children who are sent to school with little or no food. I donate to the PASS Room at the beginning of each school year and ask that my funds be used to buy books, play equipment, food or anything the children may need.

My church receives a monthly donation. The congregation is small but mighty in it's community outreach. It runs 3 breakfast clubs in 3 large primary schools where 100s of children who would not have breakfast otherwise benefit from a healthy meal served by church volunteers. The Visitation Committee visits shut-ins or people who are too ill to attend church and twice a year they organize a special luncheon at the church and haul everyone in for socializing, a service and a hot meal. Other committees provide support to people in hospital or families in difficult circumstances. When my sister died another committee whipped up sandwiches and had the hall decked out for everyone who attended her service - we didn't have to do a thing. The church committees seem endless and when I think about community impact return for my buck, the men and women who steer these committees stretch my dollars like only church people can.

The third organization I support is Special Olympics - Aurora, Ontario. I wanted to find an organization close to home that worked with people with Down Syndrome who will forever hold a special place in my heart due to my incredible years with my sister. Last year I attended their annual general meeting and I was overwhelmingly impressed by the volunteers, their activities and their community involvement. I know my funds go directly to the athletes and that's very rewarding and reassuring to me.

Chances are good you and everyone you know donates to charity. Some people with a lot of money may donate to the most popular organizations because their donation is more about easing their conscience and getting the tax write off than following the impact of their dollars. But for those of us with only a little extra to spread around, taking a few minutes to shop for a charity that will get the most out of our money is an exercise worth doing. After all, helping as many people as possible should be the priority rather than sending in our hard earned bucks to go toward inflated salaries for executives and catered Christmas parties for staff.

Charitable donations. Make your money count

The vast majority of us donate a portion of our hard-earned money to charity. But unlike sending your taxes off to the government and hearing later that it was used illegally for a partisan advertising campaign, you can pick and choose your charity and thereby have some control over how your donation is spent.

My husband used to support a well-know children's hospital. That was until he heard that the CEO of the hospital was paid a bonus of $500,000 last year on top of his regular salary of $400,000+. When I was in graduate school, we were told the operating budget of the Canadian Cancer Society was larger than the federal cancer research budget. Somehow I think the Canadian Cancer Society will persevere without my $50.

A few years ago a friend of mine told me that her newly retired father thought he might do some volunteer work for The United Way. One of his friends was already involved in the organization and invited him to a lunch meeting. My friend's father went and when the meeting was called to order, all the executives started taking their lunches out of their briefcases. He had not taken his lunch, thinking that sandwiches would be provided but nope, only some coffee and no styrofoam cups either because everyone had their own mugs. Now that's an organization after my own heart. No spending my hard-earned harness dollars on catered lunches.

I don't have much cash to spread around but I feel very strongly that my business is God's work and therefore some of my earnings will always support my charities of choice. Stay tuned to hear more about them.

A close(r) look at my Child Harness design

A few days ago I had a Mom order a couple of my Child Harnesses for her twins. She told me she already had  harnesses for them but they were the kind where the strap went around their waist so every time they pulled and got to the end of the lead, they tipped over face first. She said she was excited when she found my design because the lead attaches higher up. 

Her comments got me thinking that maybe I should post an explanation about how and why I came up with my Child Harness design. All this info is on my site but it seems like it's worth repeating.

Some features of my Child Harness are no brainers. The really long lead for example. I'm tall. My baby was short. There was distance between us. The store bought harness I had almost yanked him off his feet the first time I tried it. When I developed my own design, a long lead was just common sense.

Coming up with the O-ring between the shoulder blades for the lead attachment was very much a eureka moment. I wanted the lead to attach ABOVE the child's centre of gravity, and the O-ring with the 2 support loops was the perfect solution. Like that other Mom, my store bought harness also had the (short) lead attach around the waist and when my little guy pulled on the lead, his big fat head tipped him over face first. That only happened once because I immediately reconstructed the harness so I could clip the lead to the leather higher up. No big deal. I had made a couple of changes to a store bought harness and I sort of had a product that worked.

Then it broke. In 2 places actually, but the hand strap was where it broke first. (The adjustment point on one shoulder strap was the other.) I was so annoyed. I don't know how long I'd been using it but since my son was only 2 1/2, I needed it for a whole lot longer and the last thing I wanted to do was buy another harness of the same design.

So in one afternoon I had my own design laid out, supplies purchased and a harness sewn up on my Mom's 1940's Singer machine.

The rest, as they say, is Children's Harnesses by Elaine, Inc.

Our words are numbered. I make mine count

Each and every one of us will speak a finite number of words in our lifetimes.

We will write a finite number of words.

We all die. And when we die we no longer speak, we no longer write. It's over. Those words could be totaled. It's a finite number.

What if all the words we ever spoke or wrote were sorted and piled up around us when our spirits left our bodies? How big a pile would the Dishonest Words be? How big a pile would the Swear Words be? What about Hurtful Words? What about the piles for Words of Kindness, Encouragement, Sympathy and Understanding?

If I take an inventory at this point in my life, I can tell you I haven't added to the Swear Words pile in a long time. I have my husband to thank for getting me out of that habit. Lately I've been adding heaps to the Kindness and Understanding piles. I'm not a 20-something any more and when I think back to the words I've caste around in my life, I'm ashamed to admit that the Love and Encouragement piles aren't as big as they should be. But I'm working on those and every day they grow to overshadow their more Hurtful Cousins.

In this day and age of anonymous internet, Dishonest Words can be flung around with glee and abandon behind fabricated identities, the owner never imagining that those Dishonest Words carry their DNA and maybe, just maybe, are being added to a pile with their name on it. I read an excellent article a while ago and the author referred to these people as Trolls, intent only on causing harm to others.

I consider myself incredibly fortunate. I haven't met any Trolls on the internet. I have wonderful and amazing customers who care deeply about their children. I love my business and I love helping others. Sure I've had someone here or there take advantage of me, but all of us can say that.

What matters is how we treat others. What we say, what we type, how we say it. Our words are numbered. I'm not going to throw any more of mine on the Hurtful pile.

When to stop using my Child Harness with your child

Over the past 4 years I've had about 2 customers ask me when I stopped using my harnesses with my own boys.

The short answer is; when they were about 5 years old.

My boys had always worn harnesses and they only felt safe when they were wearing them so as they grew they would ask to wear them even though it wasn't necessary. My boys decided when to stop wearing their harnesses and because I trusted their behaviour, I left the decision up to them.

But in reality, there is a transition period that happens between using the harness every day with your child and leaving the harness at home for good.

•  initially, when you first use my Child Harness with your toddler they discover that they can run only as far as the end of the lead. Before they were able to run as far at they wanted (which is why you ordered the harness!!), now there is a limit to their range. But they soon figure out that the harness gives them an immense amount of freedom and control over one aspect of their lives: they decide when they walk or ride and they are no longer strapped into their stroller against their wishes.
•  next, your child will quickly associate the harness with outings. Putting it on is just like putting on their shoes or their jacket. It's part of the routine and they don't question it. The exciting thing is the outing and that's all they care about. For me, this phase lasted until the boys were about 4, 4 1/2.
•  as your child grows and matures, you'll have more confidence in their ability to stay close to you during your outings, especially if those outings are to familiar haunts like the grocery store or the mall during a quiet time of the week. You're not dealing with an unpredictable 2 year old any more but you're also not dealing with someone who listens to you ALL the time. The harness is a good precaution in case there is a disagreement between you and your child and your obstinate 3 1/2 year old decides to take off on you. 
•  as they mature even more, disagreements between you and your child become discussions of reason and compromise. You know their flight risk is close to zero so if they ask not to wear the harness, you agree. But you take it with you "just in case". My Child Harness is not bulky like an animal backpack harness, it bundles into it's own stuff sack so it's easy to tote along.
•  transitioning into the phase of not using the harness at all is a signal to your child that they are mature and trustworthy and you take great pride in their behaviour to act responsibly when you are out together. You'll likely find yourself carrying the harness with you needlessly for months, then decide to leave it at home that one time when disaster strikes. That happened to me and from then on I always carried their harnesses with me, no matter where we were going and no matter how long.

You are the best judge of your child's behaviour. You will know when the harness is no longer necessary. If that happens to coincide with your child's opinion as well, so much the better. But in the meantime, it's a good idea to toss the harness in your bag with your keys when you leave the house. It may seem like this phase lasts forever but before you know it, they'll be asking for those keys.